Ever since the Freuds (Sigmund and Anna), people have been throwing around lots of fancy-sounding terms like: narcissist, projection, and regression. What do these words mean? Here's a crash course and an explanation of some basic principles that apply in your day to day life:

Displacement: A psychological defense-oops better define defense-that involves transferring a feeling onto someone or something else.

Say the kids are sick. You catch it. Work is busy. Your husband is out of the country for business, and you want to stick your head in the oven. Only you can't. So, you do your very best juggling act. You get that big report in-but it is two days late and has a major typo relating to a material part of your thesis.

So where does displacement come in? As soon as your boss sees you, he tells you to, "get it together...Or else you can take that box of tissues and humidifier you dragged in from your sickbed and head straight for the unemployment office." Feeling as lousy emotionally as you do physically, you are overwrought. At this precise moment your husband calls, just to say hello, and you hear exotic music and glasses clinking in the background.

"What's that? Entertaining clients-on a cruise ship? Great, honey. I just coughed up a lung. Glad to hear you're having so much fun. Don't worry; Johnny didn't even notice you missed the soccer match, and Jenny will forgive you for missing her first home run. Why don't you give them a call?"

In just two seconds you've turned your spouse's smile to a frown. Just like that. And how do the subsequent calls go? Well he feels terrible and manages to say the wrong thing to your daughter. She hands the phone to her brother, telling him that he looks like a yeti. He wants to get away from his sister and acts rough with the family dog.

In short: Boss yells at wife, wife yells at husband, husband at daughter, daughter at son, and son kicks the dog. And all before breakfast-displacement is very quick and efficient. And it is the psychological equivalent of passing the buck.

Onto defense: a type of mental gymnastics your mind performs when it feels an uncomfortable or threatening feeling coming on. This goes on mostly out of your awareness--kind of like wearing a big protective mental shield all day long, every day. For example, you really want to watch the football game, and you are furious at your wife for inviting the annoying neighbors over for a barbeque-because instead of eating beef jerky and cheering-on your team, you're standing over a hot grill and refilling drinks all afternoon.

What defense do you use (unconsciously) to deal with your fury at your wife? Instead of realizing you are pissed off at her, you accuse her of being angry at you and you snarl at her to stop giving you such a hard time about the way you are flipping the burgers. In other words, you feel angry but perceive the situation incorrectly and conclude that the anger comes from your wife.

After you use the defense of projection, dishes begin to fly. The neighbors can't leave fast enough. You get to watch that ball game after all. Only you watch at the gym because you and your wife aren't speaking. Suddenly it doesn't matter who started it all-now everyone's angry.
So all of you serial projectors take note: when you are angry but that emotion feels uncomfortable, examine the situation closely to see what is really going on. If you can observe yourself and if you can realize that maybe, just maybe you incorrectly perceived yourself to be the recipient of another person's anger, you'll come out ahead of the game; the distortion you have become aware of is really a complex psychological event.

Regression: temporarily going backwards in time and even age-with no time machine involved; it's all psychological. Say you are in your therapist's office and find yourself preoccupied with the books on her shelf, the type of outgoing message she leaves on her voicemail, or the fact that she has a new haircut and you didn't expect her to change her appearance. It's like you are back to the feeling of being the scared little kid who is studying her mother before she goes out on the town. You are watching all of your mom's cues to make sure she'll come back just like she promised to do, because you miss her so much when she's away.

Regression is a clinical phenomenon that can occur everywhere, but is common in the therapist's office in the context of the therapeutic relationship. It can often be a very useful way to get at and work on important feelings from the past so they don't interfere with happiness and healthy functioning in the present.
Regression also applies to groups whose members all go back en masse to behaviors from times past. Don't believe me? Go to any preschool or elementary school during pick-up or drop-off time. Notice the cliques, the backstabbing, the immature behavior-and I don't mean the kids.

Which brings me to the final term, narcissist. Who doesn't hear this word uttered and bandied about on almost a daily basis? But what does narcissist mean? To whom does it refer? Surely it describes someone self-involved, self-centered, and rather puffed up. It also refers to someone who tends to take things personally. And it definitely refers to someone who is unable to step into the shoes of another; someone who cannot understand that the other is a separate human being with separate thoughts and feelings. Ringing any bells yet?

Most frenemies will fall into this category. Think of the friend who calls, constantly in crisis, always at 2 a.m. This friend is totally inured to the fact of-- insert any of the following: (a) you have a several months old baby and haven't had a second to yourself since Obama took office; (b) you have a very important meeting the next morning and you told this pal you need to sleep tonight; (c) it's the night before your wedding and you have, you know, stuff of your own on your mind; (d) you are on a great date that is going well and your friend is inconvenienced by your having a life; (e) all of the above. Frenemy, maybe. NARCISSIST? Definitely.

Next time you hear these terms at the water cooler or the coffee cart, you'll know just what they mean.

Many thanks to my great friend Dr. Wednesday Martin who made me write this post (that is known as externalization, by the way).

Stuart Elliott / New York Times:
Advertising: Known Faces Displace Amateurs in Online Videos Just as the unknowns who showed up on screen in the early days of television gave way to radio and movie stars like Jack Benny and Bob Hope, more famous faces are supplanting everyday people in Web series, particularly when the video clips are sponsored by advertisers.

Read more of this story at Slashdot.

When I first heard about this Thanksgiving thing, I thought it sounded like a great idea.

We Brits spend a ridiculous amount of time each day giving thanks to strangers we say thanks to people who hold doors for us, thanks to people who stop their cars to let us cross the road, thanks to waitresses when they give us our bill; even thanks again when we hand over the money to pay. But apparently you Americans innovative people that you are had found a way to streamline the process.

Rather than waste hours each day expressing gratitude, you had decided to compress all of your thank-yous into one annual 24-hour-period of uninterrupted Thanks Giving. Get all that politeness out of the way in one go. An inspired solution, I thought, and one we should copy back home. Hell, we should have a 'sorry' day too we'd reclaim weeks of time.

But apparently I'd got the wrong end of the stick. Having consulted Wikipedia, it turns out that today is not about mundane expression of gratitude, but rather about big-ticket Thank-yous. For friends, family, a baby's laugh, spreadable cheese. Stuff that really makes it a joy to be alive, and living in the home of the brave.

In just under an hour, I'm heading out to my first ever Thanksgiving dinner; I gather there will be turkey involved, and sweet potatoes whatever they might be. And, despite my British cynicism, I'm very excited. But before I go, given that today's celebrations began with some Brits moving to the USA and giving thanks for its awesomeness, I thought it might be appropriate to share five things technological and otherwise that make me well.. thankful that a few months ago I too decided to make America my new home.

Here goes

• 1. Free refills
  Seriously, if the Pilgrim Fathers were pleased with their first harvest, they would have shit themselves at the idea of free refills. Back home, a Coke or a coffee means precisely that: one Coke or one coffee. Here it means as much Coke or coffee as it's humanly possible to drink. And then some. Why you people don't take hollowed-out false legs with you to diners I will never understand.

• 2. Getting cool technology first
  I still remember the frustration I felt living in London and writing about technology. Every new, cool tech launch: the iPhone, Hulu, the Kindle, full episodes of the Daily Show on demand had to be prefaced with the words It's not available in the UK yet but. Even technology we did get SMS notification for Twitter, say - risked being shut off at a moments notice the moment the math(s) of subsidising a foreign market stopped making sense. Since moving here, my attitude has completely changed. Now I get all the cool stuff first. Screw my fellow countrymen, I'm buying a Droid.

• 3. Magic ATMs (and banking in general)
  Given that the PIN (n)umber and thus the modern ATM was invented by a Brit, you'd think our ATMs would lead the world in terms of features and ease of use. Not so. With a few exceptions, British ATMs are capable only of doling out money and/or swallowing our cards. Here they can read cheques sorry, checks and tell you when they're likely to clear! (The fact that no Brit has written a cheque since 1992 is irrelevant) They allow you to transfer money between accounts! They sell stamps! I imagine, if I asked nicely, they would also perform sexual favours. Seriously, America, kudos on the ATMs. (While I'm on the subject of banking additional kudos for making it easy to open a bank account here. Two forms of photo ID and I was out of Wells Fargo, account details in hand, in less than 20 minutes. Note to fellow Brits: they set up your Internet banking username and password at the same time. I know. Freaking mindblowing.)

• 4. Double-decker trains
  American trains are pretty awesome on their own. Twice as much leg-room as their British counterparts, at less than half the cost. The urban ones run like clockwork, and the cross-country ones are so comically unreliable that it's always an exciting adventure to use them. A dude in a hat actually says all aboard! like in movies! And as if all that wasn't great enough, you stack two of them on top of each other. Twice the awesome!

• 5. American women
  Ok, I may be biased, given that my last God-knows-how-many girlfriends have been American. But let's be honest, there's a reason why iTunes is full of songs like I wish they all could be Californian' and American Girls', and yet there's a conspicuous absence of tracks titled I wish they could all come from Croydon' or Welsh Girls are great'. (Useful tip, don't search for that last one on Limewire). Of course American women are without exception crazier than a box of Glenn Becks, but somehow that only adds to their charm.

• Bonus item: Glenn Beck
  Howard Beale from Network, piped into every home (or hotel room) in the land, daily. What's not to love?

For all of those things and so much more: thank you, America. And happy Thanksgiving.

Crunch Network: CrunchBoard because it's time for you to find a new Job2.0

Shared by Schlomo Rabinowitz
I'm not a fan of Wells Fargo so this kinda makes me happy... but hope the driver is ok!

Neo Displacer says: Now if only I could drive my fucking house through a fucking bank I'd feel much better

Photo by wirednerd.

Previously:

Car vs. Bank (Bank Loses)

Posted in News

Shared by Schlomo Rabinowitz
Until yesterday, my neighborhood in the Mission of San Francisco has been battling American Apparel against putting one of their stores in the neighborhood. This letter is the sanest response I have read so far on the issue. Personally, I'm anti-AA on Valencia st, but am pro-AA in other areas of the Mission.

By Emily and Kendra (via email)

We also attended the hearing [yesterday] as Mission residents and are happy that the commission voted to disapprove American Apparel opening a shop on Valencia St. Unfortunately, some of the public comments about the project and characterizations of the Mission upset us enough to speak up about some racism and classism that we witnessed.

Specifically, we found references to crime and the evolution of the Mission from an unsafe and undesirable place to a thriving business corridor as particularly offensive. Some comments, mostly from young white residents and business owners, referenced the idea that we made the neighborhood good, implicitly distinguishing themselves from other residents and businesses in the neighborhood, including the large Latino community.

Actually, long term residents HAVE been and continue to organize for a safe, clean, and thriving neighborhood, long before these newer boutiques moved in. The Mission Economic Development Association, the Mission Anti Displacement Coalition, and other concerned residents have been engaged in struggles against displacement and for economic justice for years.

Additionally, many of the small businesses argued that if formula retail enters Valencia Street, it would change the flavor, culture, and vibe of the neighborhood. However, this stance fails to acknowledge the neighborhood change that has already occurred.Boutique owners share responsibility for displacing family businesses and replacing them with businesses that sell specialty products that are not affordable for neighborhood residents.

Some comments referenced that our neighborhood can and should be divided into Valencia St. and the other Mission streets. In our excitement to keep out American Apparel, we must work together to fight against these sentiments and the splicing of our community. We hope to keep seeing small business owners call out what's right, not just on Valencia but in important battles to come on Mission St. and other places in the neighborhood.

We are writing this as newer residents in the Mission, who are working to be responsible allies to long-term residents by forming relationships with our neighbors and people who have been in this fight for decades. It is our responsibility to listen and learn the histories of the neighborhood in order to join the movement for safe communities. Let us not forget that the safety of which many people spoke of today was won at the hands of long-term residents who have fought to increase safety in the neighborhood for their families and children.

For those of you who weren't able to stay until the end, we would highly recommend listening to the Commissioners comments, specifically Commissioners Borden and Olague, who called out some of these contradictions and spoke passionately against displacement and for the neighborhood.

The community turnout for this issue was unprecedented and we hope to continue to harness this energy for the struggles to come. In the meantime, let us reach out to business owners and residents in the Mission. The Wal-Marts and the American Apparels of the world don't want us talking to each other. Our struggle for our neighborhood will be stronger if we know each other and our stories.

Posted in Media and Politics

Steven Landsburg has a provocative op-ed in the New York Times today. Essentially, he says that we should do absolutely nothing about American workers who are on the losing side of globalization:

All economists know that when American jobs are outsourced, Americans as a group are net winners. What we lose through lower wages is more than offset by what we gain through lower prices...
Suppose, after years of buying shampoo at your local pharmacy, you discover you can order the same shampoo for less money on the Web. Do you have an obligation to compensate your pharmacist? If you move to a cheaper apartment, should you compensate your landlord? When you eat at McDonald's, should you compensate the owners of the diner next door? Public policy should not be designed to advance moral instincts that we all reject every day of our lives.
In what morally relevant way, then, might displaced workers differ from displaced pharmacists or displaced landlords?...
If you're forced to pay $20 an hour to an American for goods you could have bought from a Mexican for $5 an hour, you're being extorted. When a free trade agreement allows you to buy from the Mexican after all, rejoice in your liberation -- even if Mr. McCain, Mr. Romney and the rest of the presidential candidates don't want you to.

Well, for one thing, this isn't a matter of morality, it's a matter of equity, not to mention enlightened self-interest. And for another thing, it's entirely consistent to both rejoice in being able to buy cheaper goods, and attempt to help out those who have lost their jobs as a result.

But it doesn't really matter: I suspect that Landsburg lost about 95% of his readers when he found himself forced to start his argument with an "all economists know that" sentence.

Update: Rodrik weighs in.